彼氏さま
by Nyou
Summary: Title: kareshi-sama. Unwanted, beyond borderline attention. "I will pay for your expenses/boarding/food/electricity/water/overall existence." Heavily one-sided(?) 「Atobe/Sakuno」


Dear Ryuzaki-san,

My magnificent self have predicted that you must be very humbled that I am personally writing you a letter. I will be prompt to the point of this very special occasion.

Congratulations. You have sought out for me and in return, caught my attention. I know that you have wished for something more between us, so wish no further, Ryuzaki-san. I will bestow that wish on your pure maiden's heart. I can't imagine how happy you are to receive the greatest news in your short commoner's life, for I myself have heard many wondrous news in my life filled with fortune. This must be a dream for you. A dream that many lady, like yourself have longed for. You must be happy that I have deemed you worthy.

First and foremost, I would like for you to agree on some terms before we successfully establish our relationship. Fret not my little lamb. Although what's between us is still pending approval, my heart already beats for yours.

My esteemed self have granted you access to address me by my given name, Keigo. Any honorifics along with my name will be up to you. Are you grateful towards my generosity? I am looking forward to hearing which you have chosen.

Secondly, I am afraid that you will have to transfer schools. I am a very reasonable man however, Ryuzaki-san. If you must stay at your current educational establishment, it would be fine with it so long as you cheer for me and my team during any sporting or competitive event. However, you must attend the same Senior Highschool as I once you graduate.

Speaking of which, I've decided to attend a Private Highschool in Britain. Prepare to move in short three years, my adoring lamb. Again, do not fret. I will pay for your expenses/boarding/food/electricity/water/overall existence. You will accept this. You will not feel bad about my spendings and you will not pay me back in any way. Your money would just insult me, Ryuzaki-san. I'm worth more than you can imagine.

Every morning, night, and breaks in between school, we must be in contact with each other via text messaging. I am fully aware of your forgetfulness, Ryuzaki-san. Not to worry though, because I will use my resources to keep tabs on you when this occurs - which for some reason most do not enjoy? What's not to like? My great self is interested enough to thoroughly scrutinize and inspect every detail of you! I am sure you wouldn't mind though. But in case you argue, I am/will be your boyfriend, Ryuzaki-san. If the time or chance comes that you get taken by strangers, I have the ability to hunt them down in a shift manner. For example; Even if you run, even if you hide, I will find you.

In any event which we are not alone and I am with your commoner friends, you will introduce me as your respective boyfriend. I am more than fine if you bragged about my perfection, but I know you are the modest type. You can sneak subtle things as you converse with them though, referring to me with masculine nicknames such as 'King' and 'Knight' are fine. Please refrain from giving me cuddly ones such as 'Sweetie-poo', Ryuzaki-san. I am above that. I expect you to understand my status.

Also, I am very interested in your delightful cooking. I have eaten the food of many great chefs, but I've heard great things about your cooking. I expect a love-filled bento every so often.

Please do not worry about the death threats you may receive. I have already started forwarding your mail towards my estate to filter them out before you get the rest of your mail. I know you are grateful towards my thoughtfulness! No need to worry if something leaks through.

I do expect you to make mistakes, however. My dear Ryuzaki-san is very clumsy and that is okay. I expect you to be Ryuzaki Sakuno. And once our relationship status is approved, you will be my Ryuzaki Sakuno-chan.

With love and regards, Atobe Keigo.

Sumire didn't bother to open the flashy red envelope with golden shimmery trimmings. The moment she saw the return address and name of the sender, she immediately crumpled it up into a paper ball and tossed it into the waste bin.

"When will that granddaughter of mine going to get a restraining order against that loon?"

* * *

I've written this years ago and posted it on a tumblr blog. I hope that people will enjoy this and Atobe's looniest! I really did used to enjoy dabbling into a crazier side of Atobe. Ha.


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